Of Taxis and Husbands…

In Cairo, the primary way of transportation from point A to point B without having any previous knowledge of the metro, minibus system or actual geographical location of either point, is a taxi. Having moved 4 times in the past 3 months, I’ve had to reacquaint myself with my point A. Now being settled to some extent in Medinat Nasr, I’m partial to the mini-bus and metro for longer distances. Before becoming comfortable with these though, I’ve ridden in over 100 taxis. I’ve actually even found the SAME taxi driver, in a completely different location from where he picked me up before, or where he dropped me off. I’ve made my rounds and there are enough “Taxi Chronicles” to create a seperate blog. However, this will not focus on one particular expedition, but rather the knowledge acquired through these experiences.

 Choosing and obtaining a taxi in Cairo is very similar to choosing and obtaining a husband.

At the beginning of your journey, if you’ve started to look for one early on, you can be pickier about your taxi. However, if you’re a bit late and you’re in a hurry to get to point b (ie. biological clock is ticking loudly) you don’t have the luxury of being so picky. This ranges from the vehicle, his age, his driving ability, his manners, the environment, the money, the location…whatever the case may be if you’re desperate…you’ll take anyone.

You have to first of all let them know you’re available. Sometimes if you’re by yourself and don’t look like you’re doing anything, they might stop by of their own accord. If you have friends, they can do the signalling. However, don’t rely solely on either of these, as they might think you’re waiting for a mini-bus. You can be a very subtle, simply with the motion of your hand. If for some reason, you’re having trouble getting his attention you may have to verbalize your need, “TAX!” Don’t feel shy. You need “TAX” and he has it.

As the taxi approaches and you check him out, you look for the make and model of the vehicle. Does it look like it won’t take you very far down the road? Will he need you to get out and push the taxi with him to get it started? Does it have a very bad, dusty, smelly, torn interior? (Coming soon: Anatomy of a Cairo Taxi) This is checking him out for how well he will physically be able to provide you with transportation (support) you need.

Is he very old? Is he wearing 2 inch thick frames and is he more nervous in the traffic than you are? This taxi driver may have passed his prime. He might be headed in a different direction than you are, and although you may try to redirect, he knows he’s older (read:wiser) and takes you the way he thinks is best. Is he too young? Does his head barely reach over the steering wheel? Does his voice crack when responding to your salaams? Do you have more facial hair than he does? This guy would be illegal to drive in most countries. He’s too fast, doesn’t know where he is going, and is willing to put your life in danger as he crosses the busiest intercessions, dogding trucks and buses by the hair of his chinny chin chin.

You need someone who isn’t too old, but has matured into someone who has understanding. He should drive as though he is ready to take on any aggressive drivers, but enough to not put your life in danger. He is temporarily guarding you against the other taxis, BMW’s, trucks, and donkey carts that also think they own the road.

Before we move on to the deeper aspects of this relationship, there is one more superficial thing to be dealt with. The money, the nookood, the flooz, how many ginnay can he get out of you? and how many are you willing to part with. Always start low, and he’ll probably double the price as his response. Counteract with something in the middle, unless you KNOW its too much. Move on to the next guy who doesn’t want to play you for a fool. Mind you, this is before anything actually happens, before you go anywhere. Once you get in his car…you play by his rules. Back to the money, unless you’re desperate, as long as you know the proper rate, keep trying until someone with sense and dignity comes along. Someone who is not trying to cheat you out of your money because you happen to pronounce your JEEM’s and QAF’s properly!  

Now to the deeper aspects of this fleeting relationship: what are his manners like:

Does he respect you as a muslima by responding to your salaams?

Does he open the door for you?

Does he turn down the arabic music that is blasting? or better yet, does he already have some Quran playing?

Does he eyeball you in his rearview mirror? or does he keep his eyes on the road?

Does he know his way around, or does he have to ask many many many many different people for directions?

If you ask him about the area, is he able to give helpful information in a polite way?

Does he ask too much personal information, other than the normal “why are you here?” like, “are you married” ,”do you have any kids?” etc.

Does he burn out his cigarrette for you? or better yet, he doesn’t smoke!

 Okay, I know some of these things you don’t see until after you’ve gone for a short drive with him, but hey if he passes on all counts, maybe he’ll be your on-call driver.

Other ways in which Taxis and Husbands are similar is that:

Sometimes you flag him down, but he’s already taken.

Sometimes you flag him down from far away, but as he gets closer you see that you shouldn’t have.

After you’ve gotten in the taxi, other people may try to get a ride from him as well. He has the ability, and needs the money. Even though you’re sitting in the backseat thinking, “Can’t you just take me where I want to go? Why do you have to look for someone else to take somewhere else? I’m not enough?”, it’s his right to have other passengers as long as they’re headed in the same general direction. He doesn’t really care about consulting you, and you’ve just met him so you’re not going to make a fuss. Seeing it from other “passenger’s” perspective: she needs a ride too, and one day, it could be (and probably will be) you waiting for a taxi after waiting for so long, you’re tired and you’re running late and you’ll see an elderly man in an old taxi, with another woman in the backseat, asking for too much money and you’ll take him.